Unpopulace

Random thought: The rate of societal decay is at its fastest in the comment sections. Perhaps loneliness is a side effect of the actual epidemic of disdain.

I'm unsure what I expected to get from setting up a Discord server. I mainly exercised open-mindedness when a friend explained why he had set one up for himself. This is similar to why another friend built his Slack group during the pandemic.

They sought community and believed either their opinions and perspectives or those of their friends would make for engaging and fruitful conversations. They were right, for the most part. Both groups followed a general guideline: "Do to me as you would to my face in my house." In other words, we are not faceless, anonymous figures conversing online. You are invited to this space like you would be asked to be at my house and expected to conduct yourself accordingly.

That simple guideline was my first red flag. It is a fair expectation, and I adopt the same general premise as a code of conduct for my server. But when I linger on this metaphor a bit more, I wonder, "When do I get to spend time in my own home?" The internet gives us this false sense of having unlimited access to unlimited data. But there are limits. Limits to how long you can or should scroll, read, and comment. Limits to what, when, and how you share, given you are doing so in spaces you don't necessarily control. Limits to where you can be at any one time.

The Where: That's probably the biggest reason my discord was doomed. I spend more time in my friend's server - and when there, for a little too long, I begin to think, "I've got shit to do; get out of here."

I set up my server, hoping to pool my disparate networks into one place, expand my perspectives, and share my point of view with people who have implored me to share more. And yet, when I extended the invites, three people joined. The rest still send me DMs and private comments on the random things I do and share online. I don't fault them. I fight the urge daily to delete accounts and profiles and leave groups - all to quiet the digital noise.

I switch between Discord, WhatsApp, and Slack multiple times a day. These additional touch points are more stressful for someone already drained by social media.

This blog was meant to house my long-form ramblings, not other's opinions on it.

I think that's enough for me.